Plastic Army Men

Just The Facts

1. If you didn't have Plastic Army Men growing up, you turned out to be a sociopath.
2. If you're saying "well, that's not true!" or "but we were poor!" right now, you should know denial and justification are both sociopathic traits.
3. Authorities have been notified.

Cracked on Plastic Army Men

Back in the days where youngsters had legs and a shape, one of the best ways to entertain yourself was with little plastic army men: Even today, roughly half of all grown men cannot help but see trenches in the garden walls and cliffsides in tree roots. These little soldiers, sometimes based on actual national armies, watched their friends die face down in the mud for this patch of sidewalk. They taught us all about tiny duty, itty-bitty honor, wee sacrifice and bite-sized heroism.

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