90 Miles From Tyranny

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Sunday, September 16, 2018

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10 Offbeat Stories You Might Have Missed This Week (9/15/18)

It’s the weekend again, which means it is time to look back at some of the quirkier news items of the week. Morris is back with the mind-blowing events right here. If you’re all caught up on the important stuff, read on for the weird and funny.

We enter the world of crime this week. We learn about inept robbers who get foiled by a bong and a pothead who gets busted by her own toddler. We also discover that if you want to murder your husband, you probably shouldn’t write an essay on the topic and post it online beforehand. In the animal world, we learn about curious amphipods that kidnap other creatures to help them ward off their own predators.

10  Game Night At Vyborg Castle

Last month, officials from the Russian castle-turned-museum Vyborg revealed that they’d found a secret chamber inside the structure originally built as an outpost for the Kingdom of Sweden over 700 years ago. Museum director Vladimir Tsoi recently announced the preliminary findings in an online post. Most intriguing was a medieval board game.

The “board” consisted of intersecting lines of squares carved into a clay brick. Tsoi identified it as a version of Nine Men’s Morris, a strategy game that has been played since Roman times, at least. The goal is to move your pieces, called “men,” into rows of three called “mills.” When a mill is achieved, the opposing player loses a game piece.[1] A modern variant called “cowboy checkers” is still played today.

Vyborg Castle has seen many restorations over the course of its seven-century existence as it changed hands between Russia, Sweden, and Finland. Archaeologists are hopeful that the chamber will turn out to be a secret passage which links the castle, which sits on an islet, to the city nearby. More historical finds are expected in the months to come.

9   Remodeling The Lizard People’s Lair





For those unaware, the Denver International Airport is a favorite target of conspiracy nuts. There are quite a few “theories” out there. Some say it was built to hide underground bunkers or a secret lair. It is under the control of the Freemasons, the Illuminati, or the lizard people, depending on who you ask.

To be fair, there are some weird things about the airport. According to its dedication stone, it was partly funded by something called the “New World Airport Commission,” an organization on which there is almost no information. It also has some creepy murals and a giant statue of a blue horse which killed its creator when a piece broke off and landed on him.

Finally, it seems that officials have decided to come clean regarding the airport’s sinister background, as recent posters placed around the terminals announce that their workers are remodeling the lizard people’s lair.[2]

In reality, this is just a cheeky nod to the airport’s bizarre reputation in order to conceal renovations. Others suggest the posters are being used for a cover-up. In 2008, Kim Day became the new chief executive for Denver International Airport and decided to embrace the conspiracies. Since then, they’ve had Illuminati art exhibits, conspiracy costume parties, and even a contest to win a tour of the mysterious underground facilities underneath the airport.

8   Hostage Situation At Sea
Scientists at the Alfred Wegener Institute for Polar and Marine Research in Germany report on the unusual behavior of certain amphipods that kidnap pteropods, also known as sea snails, in order to ward off predators.

Researchers first observed the phenomenon in the austral summer of 2016–2017 during an expedition into the Southern Ocean. The intended goal was to investigate the distribution, abundance, and ecological role of amphipods. However, biologists noticed that certain specimens were carrying something strange. Upon closer inspection, that something turned out to be pteropods. These sea snails produce chemicals which ward off predators, although they don’t seem to affect amphipods. Icefish that prey on both are deterred from attacking the crustaceans with the sea snail backpacks.

A search revealed that the phenomenon was first reported by US researchers in 1990, but only in coastal waters and never in the open ocean. This time around, biologists were interested in seeing if there is some kind of mutualistic relationship between different species—perhaps amphipods are protected from predators, and pteropods save energy by being carried around. Actually, the practice doesn’t benefit the sea snails at all. They are trapped in place by the crustaceans using two pairs of legs. They become unable to feed, and they starve.[3]

7   Busted By Her Progeny





















A toddler landed her mom in trouble with the law when she took out the mother’s weed stash in front of police during a traffic stop.

State troopers pulled a car over outside Albany, New York, when they saw a young passenger who was not in a child’s car seat. They became suspicious after noticing several butt ends of marijuana cigarettes in the ashtray.

One of the troopers was questioning the mother and the man behind the wheel while the other one was supervising the toddler. The three-year-old girl decided to narc on her parent and pulled out a bag of marijuana and a smoking pipe from under the front seat.[4]

The mother and the driver were arrested and charged with child endangerment. Authorities turned the child over to other family members and notified the county child protective services of her mother’s arrest.

6    What Won’t People Do For Pizza?

Levi-Strauss Doubles Down on Gun Control Push

Levi-Strauss is doubling down on its move into progressive politics by joining forces with Bloomberg to push radical gun control measures:



Levi Strauss & Co. is taking a stand against gun violence, an unexpectedly political move from the all-American denim company that could turn off some customers — but also win it points with a new segment of shoppers.


The San Francisco-based retailer said last week it is pledging more than $1 million to support nonprofits and youth activists who are working to end gun violence. The company is also partnering with Michael Bloomberg to help create a coalition of business leaders who support gun control measures and encouraging employees to get involved in political causes.

“The gun violence epidemic in America has hit a point where something has to be done,” chief executive Chip Bergh said in an interview. “It’s inevitable that we’re going to alienate some consumers, but we can no longer sit on the sidelines and remain silent on this issue.” 

He added that consumer reaction so far has been...

Concealed-Carry Hero Swoops in After Police Officer Is Shot 4 Times

“Cicero getting off I-55, I’ve been shot, I’ve been shot several times,” Officer Luis Duarte can be heard saying as he called in his own injuries. The Cicero, Illinois, cop and and his partner had had been pursuing a suspect when things took a frightening turn when they attempted to stop a car with California plates that had been reported stolen, according to ABC7.

Cicero Police Department Superintendent Jerry Chlada, Jr. explained what happened next. “The vehicle refused to stop, our officers were able to box the vehicle in right at the entrance ramp at I-55 and Cicero Avenue where the subject immediately exited his vehicle and began shooting multiple rounds at our officers.”

The Chicago Sun Times reported that the suspect used an automatic weapon to spray bullets at officers and their vehicle. That is when Duarte was hit four times, twice in the arm, once in the leg and once in the abdomen.

But Chlada told reporters that something remarkable happened then. “We were lucky enough to have a citizen on the street there who’s a concealed-carry holder, and he also engaged in gunfire.”

The suspect was hit by gunfire and then captured. He was taken to the hospital where he was listed as being in serious condition.

Town President Larry Dominick praised the unidentified citizen, stuck in rush hour traffic at the time of the incident, who leaped to the defense of the officers. “He got out and started helping the police, which is something I’ve got to be proud of.”

According to the Chicago Tribune, Dominick also had this to say about the citizen helper. “I want to applaud the citizen, a civilian, who risked his life to help in apprehending this armed suspect.”

The Cicero Police Department has been posting updates on Twitter. In one, they shared some good news about Duarte:


Update on Ofc Duarte: he is out of surgery and currently resting comfortably. Thank you to everyone for the Prayers and support!
They also thanked the community for the overwhelming response. All over social media, love, prayers and support have been poured out for the police in general and Duarte, specifically:

The Cicero Police Department would like to thank everyone for the overwhelming prayers and support for Ofc Duarte and the entire Cicero Police Department. It’s been an unspeakable 24 hours and we sincerely appreciate everyone out there who has reached out to us.

The “good guy with a gun” who assisted police was also remembered by...

Morning Mistress

The 90 Miles Mystery Box: Episode #381


You have come across a mystery box. But what is inside? 
It could be literally anything from the serene to the horrific, 
from the beautiful to the repugnant, 
from the mysterious to the familiar.

If you decide to open it, you could be disappointed, 
you could be inspired, you could be appalled. 

This is not for the faint of heart or the easily offended. 
You have been warned.

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